Memoria Arts~ Life in the Making

Beauty and the (food) Beast, Vol. 4

Making the Switch: Assessing Food Allergies

    I realized that there is so much information that goes with this subject that I have informally begun to do a post a week (apparently every Wednesday) on it. I'd rather slow down and give the info in manageable chunks rather than dozens of paragraphs that are hard to read in a blog format. So let's go with what works, and I'll keep trying to add new info every week. I am so glad that this is helpful. 

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   IF food allergies are suspected, OR food seems to affect behavior, OR you are just curious to see if special diet can make a difference, there are three steps that I would recommend first.

1. Keep a food diary. Before a special diet is embarked upon, I would strongly recommend that a journal is kept of every thing that is eaten for a month (on a 'normal' diet, no changes made). In addition, I would try to jot down any observations from the day- behavioral, emotional, environmental (like, we had a very busy day to day, had to run lots of errands- what is happening in the child's environment that day). Try not to think about it or edit or assess for trends, just "do it". At the end of the month, set aside some time to read through and evaluate the journal. What trends can be seen? Are there "trigger" foods where a noticeable change occurs? And so on and so forth. Sometimes it's really obvious- like - had milk today, had four over the top temper tantrums. Other times, it's not so clear. Looking at it over a month of trend will make those less clear allergies clearer. This is valuable information, as it creates a 'baseline'.  Honestly, if you realize that there is a serious food allergy right away, go ahead and take the offending food out. There is no reason to continue damaging the child's health and well being. But a lot of the time, the allergy isn't that obvious.
2. Consult your pediatrician or family practitioner. At this point, hopefully you have found a doctor that is willing to work with you, not against you. If you haven't, keep looking. Regardless, ask your doctor to perform the kind of evaluations that would normally occur during a yearly physical- growth, height, weight, BMI (Body Mass Index), CBC. The idea, again, is to have a baseline for your child- what is "normal". Children who struggle with undiagnosed food allergies often are under-weight and under-height for their growth curve. Make sure you tell your doctor about any obvious signs: chronic constipation, chronic loose bowels, skin that is cracked and dry. Sometimes skin is is sandpaper rough with white raised bumps, sometimes it just looks like a case of teenage angst. Also, mention behavioral issues: inattention, moony-ness (that sort of 'vacant' look), outbursts. Developmental issues always start their evaluation with your family doctor, who then refers out to other specialists, so make sure they know any thing that concerns you. My whole adventure with Isaiah began with me saying to his pediatrician: " Isaiah is really floppy all the time and I don't understand why." (I was describing low muscle tone and lack of coordination, but I didn't know that.) It was enough of a flag for my doctor to do some simple coordination tests (touch your nose, stand up straight, etc.) and realize that Isaiah had a serious problem. As he began to be evaluated for the physical issues, his occupational and physical therapists all responded back to my doctor that they suspected he may struggle with Sensory Processing Disorder. My doctor was also the one that connected his GERD with a dairy allergy.
3. Try to get a referral to a dietitian or nutritionist, if your insurance will pay. Unfortunately, Isaiah's insurance does not pay for this in any shape or form, so his doctor and I have had to cobble together what we know and I am constantly doing research to improve his diet. But I would strongly recommend this valuable help if it can be had, because they have the specific training to individualize and tailor a diet to fit your child's need. For example, if you are taking milk out of the diet, is essential to make sure that other sources of calcium and protein are increased to make up the difference. A dietitian can help you figure out what is best for your child. They also can do very specific evaluations that will help in ways a normal pediatrician or family practitioner would not be able to do.

Once you have a "base line" for your child and the doctors and specialists you need are on board (if they can be had), you can begin an elimination diet to determine what foods offend or cause issues. I'll get into what this is in much more depth next time. Basically, you take what you suspect out (based on your food journal) and note any changes. Eventually, the offending food is added back into the diet, and the reaction is watched. Again, continuing to track food intake in journal form is important. Remember when your child first began eating table food? You would give her one food at a time, about one a week, to make sure there wasn't an allergy. Same idea, just in reverse.

    One thing to keep in mind is that it's not forever. It can seem so overwhelming at first- restrictive diets, having to avoid offending foods. If food wasn't a battle ground before, it definitely will seem like it is now. But the evaluation time is relatively short- between three and six months. After that, a new 'normal' begins where most foods are okay. Be patient and you will be rewarded, I promise. 

(Make sure you read the comments in these posts- so much good stuff has been mentioned there- the discussion continues in them. I've switched the comments to threaded comments so we can respond directly to each other in a clearer sort of way.)

Beauty and the (food) Beast, Vol. 3

Understanding the Behavioral/Body Connection

    My good friend Donna has been giving so much good advice in the comment sections of these posts- make sure you catch them. I might just ask her to do a guest post in this series- so much good information there. Her son (whom I went to school with) had/has serious food allergies. One of the things she mentioned is where I'd like to start off today.

    My best advice: go slow, watch very carefully. What looks like a cold every Christmas may turn out to be a poinsettia allergy. What looks like chapped hands from the cold may be a reaction to the acid in oranges or tomatoes. Read every label, every time. Each time packaging changes on a product, know that the ingredients may have changed as well. Be very careful with vaccinations and injections with a chicken protein base... those with egg allergies can and will react. (Donna Barrow, Beauty and the (food) Beast, Vol.2, comment section)

I want to focus on the behavioral connection with food allergies today. There is a corollary to what Donna said: What looks like inattention and anger might be a nutritional deficiency. What looks like agitation might be a reaction to a food allergy making me feel bad. I've gotten a lot of comments over the last few years that my child's behavior couldn't be that effected by food allergies- it's just a failure to discipline, train, etc. And while to some extent a child should be taught to control his or her reactions and outbursts, if there is a reason behind why they are misbehaving, it behooves us as parents to figure out as much as we can.

     I often stop these conversations with the person by asking them why they drink coffee. Without a pause, almost every person will respond with, "because it helps me wake up (or) it keeps me awake." And then I'll ask, "so what happens when you don't get your coffee in the morning?" They'll smile a bit, maybe deflect, and answer in some sort of way that they are pretty grumpy and they have a 'hard time getting started'. My final question is usually, "So...is coffee a drug, or a drink you enjoy?" The whole point of the line of questioning is to point out how a common drink we enjoy affects our bodies and our behavior. If they keep pushing it, I ask them what happens when they eat a hot pepper. "Oh, well, my mouth gets really hot, my eyes start to water, my face turns red." I let that sit in the air for a few moments time, and say- 'so there's a food that affects your body in a very clear, identifiable way.' That's when I will repeat again that if you give my child something he's allergic to, it will affect his body and his behavior, and while every kid has his bad days and his good days, feeding him food that affects his body and behavior in a negative way means his bad days will outnumber the good ten to one.

    The fact of the matter is, everything we consume affects our body in some way. That's how God designed us. That's how He designed food. It's made to be used in specific ways, and the body knows what it needs. It also knows when it has had too much, as in the case of too many carbohydrates and sugar being turned into fat.  We've gotten so far away from real food. What we eat bears a fourth cousin resemblance to what our bodies are intended for. (See Vol.2 in this series for a list of resources that talk about this issue.) Most common allergens in kids are from things that were never meant to be used in the body (or) have been used too much. A peanut allergy is a great example. Do you know how many processed foods, particularly at fast food restaurants, are soaked in peanut oil? Or have common sulfa based perservatives in them?

Here's a video blast from the past that sort of makes my point for me. (But Breyers is now owned by Unilever, and don't get me started on the "natural" tara gum that's in all their ice cream and how marketing affects food buying and, and, and, and....) Oh, just watch the video.

    I challenge you to start reading every label of everything you purchase at the grocery store on your next trip. You need to be aware of everything that is going in your body. By extension, you need to be aware of everything that is going into your child's body. It's not that it is all bad or anything, but that you do need to know what you are eating.

    So what does the body/behavior to allergy connection look like? I already showed you what allergy reactions looked like on my children's faces. Let me describe what happens when Isaiah gets anything with Red 40 in it. There's a host of physical responses (remember eating the hot pepper?), but there are clear, definable behavioral reactions. Say I give him a strawberry sucker (which isn't strawberry at all and is just a bunch of chemicals and fake sugar popped on a stick)- within minutes, he's wiggling in his chair. A few minutes more and the volume of his voice gets louder. Half an hour out from that having that candy, he's wiggly, inattentive, and driving me nuts. (Of course, in my situation, knowing that he's had something he's allergic to, my first option would be to send him outside to play and run it off. My second response, depending on the level of allergen ingested, would be to give him a dose of Benadryl. Dye-free of course.) It would be patently ridiculous at that point to sit him down and make him sit still and quiet. He's been given a bunch of chemicals that not only does his body not know what to do with them- his body has an overactive histamine response to them. His body has clearly marked the invaders as foreign and is waging battle against them. To put it this way, think about the last time you walked in poison ivy. Remember how miserable that made you? Now put that inside your body and try to imagine what that might feel like. Would you be able to 'behave'? Yes, to a point, because we as adults have learned self control. Children don't have those tools in their toolbox yet (especially during the toddler years)- that's our job as parents to show them how to 'hold the tools and use them properly'. So why, on the green earth wide, would we do or give them something that would make it impossible for them to use those tools?

    That's the reality of food allergens and behavior. It affects us, and them, whether we like to admit or not. Whether we want it to or not. Trust me. If I could see my way clear to a big old slice of cheesy, gooey, Chicago style pizza right this second for lunch, I would be eating it as fast as my teeth could munch! But I know it's just not right for me right now.  I'd be grumpy and feel bad, and Josiah would scream and scream and not be happy by any stretch of the imagination. He wouldn't sleep, which would mean I wouldn't sleep, and then I'd be really grumpy. If the simple fix is to not eat the food, then don't eat it!

    I realize that is easier said than done. Boy, do I ever. I've got five kids. Three with clearly identifiable food allergies. It adds up to meal planning and meal preparation that can get overwhelming at times. I let them have macaroni and cheese when I know that in reality it will just make them sick, but I'm exhausted and tired and making it is easy. It's a constant learning curve. I forget to read a label and one of the kids will start acting "weird"- I'll go back and read the label and groan when I realize what was in it that I missed because I was in a hurry and didn't read. But it can be done. It is a matter of discipline.

Next in this series: Making the Switch.

Beauty and the (food) Beast, Vol. 2

I think there will be two more posts in this series- one on the link between Sensory Processing Disorder and food allergies, and another on how we've practically made this switch over the last four years (you can do it, I promise). I want to take my time and do it right, so look for Vol 3 sometime the middle of next week. But for today, my husband and I brainstormed all the stuff we've read or used that someone else might find helpful. I'd love it for my readers to comment on these posts (and hopefully Connect will be fixed ASAP), as I know a few of you have substantial stores of knowledge on how to deal with food allergies (that's you, Donna!). Let me know of any resources we can add in here- this is by no means a comprehensive list.

 General Knowledge Resources

These are resources to learn more about how our industrial food system works in America, or information, specifically, on what you should be eating versus the S.A.D diet (Standard American Diet).

The Maker's Diet by Jordan Rubin (He's also written quite a few variations on this theme- the latest is called Perfect Weight America, but it's all essentially what he said in the original book. Some have been re-edited to focus on a specific problem, such as diabetes or women's issues. )

Animal, Vegetable, Mineral by Barbara Kingsolver

The Omnivore's Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals by Micheal Pollan

In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto by Micheal Pollan

The End of Food by Paul Roberts

The Fatal Harvest, edited by Andrew Kimbrell

The Art of the Commonplace: Agrarian Essays... by Wendell Berry

Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser

Uncertain Peril by Claire Hope Cummings

Food, Inc by Peter Pringle

Healthy Eating Resources/ Cooking

Feeding the Whole Family: Cooking with Whole Foods by Cynthia Lair (This is primarily a vegetarian cookbook, but it has many good recipes in it.)

Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallon 

Prescription for Nutritional Healing by Phyllis A Balch, CNC (Make sure you find the most recent edition of this, I think Vol 4? It's gone through revisions over the years, and is very expansive and in depth.)

Sensory Processing Disorder/ Food Allergy Resources

Super-immunity for Kids by Dr. Leo Galland

Help for the Hyperactive Child by Dr. William Crook

The Yeast Syndrome by Dr. John Trowbridge

Beyond Prozac by Dr. Micheal Norden

5HTP by Dr. Micheal Murray

Vita-Nutrient Solution by Dr. Robert Atkins

The LCP Solution by Dr. Jacqueline Stordy

Anything from Dianne Craft- I've had the chance to actually hear her speak and talk to her in person, and her Biology of Behavior CD Set does a great job of condensing a lot of the studies and solutions for sensory affected kids into one clear, understandable listening experience. You can visit her website at www.diannecraft.org

As with anything, read any of these resources with an educated, guarded eye. Some of this stuff might seem way off the deep end to you- and that's ok. Just use what you need and discard the rest. And always, always keep conversations going with your pediatrician/family practitioner and OBGYN/midwife. You might be surprised- my doctors (all very 'modern') have been nothing but supportive and have done things to help and not hinder. You won't know until you start the conversation. If your Dr. is absolutely resistant, try finding another doctor. Many of the younger doctors are being trained in more holistic methods as well as the latest 'modern' techniques. 

Beauty and the (food) Beast, Vol 1...

Sandi asked a few weeks ago if I could talk about our food adventures a little bit more. I promptly dropped off the radar to deal with just such an adventure, so everything is fresh in my mind again as to why we started down this road again. I've written about it a little bit over the years in my Sustainable Living category, so poke over there if you're interested.

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It's been four weeks, three days, four hours and thirty eight minutes since I last had milk. (Cow's milk, that is.)

Can you tell I miss it?

And (corollary)...do you have any idea how much food has milk or milk products in it? 

So long, double-stuffed Mint Oreos (my one obsession). So long, Starbucks fix. (They do make stuff with soy milk, but have you tasted the stuff? Nasty doesn't come close, and it totally spoils that hard earned five dollar coffee experience!) So long, chocolate. So long, Spinach and Garlic Alfredo Pasta (one of our favorite meals). I shall miss you, but it's all for the better. Right? That's what I keep telling myself.

Why for?

This sweet little guy...check out this somewhat blurry picture of his face, and you can see the problem...

His face from the eyes down is covered in a lovely red rash that went down his neck and onto his shoulders. It had already begun to fade when this picture was taken, but you can get an idea. Here's a picture taken yesterday:

There's that clear baby skin we're all used to seeing. The difference is in the fact that I took out every vestige of milk-based anything out of my diet.

To put it another way, here's David:

(please excuse the snot smear)

This is David after a week or so of "junk" food, which in our house is anything processed.

OH! So that's why we started eating the way we did...sometimes I forget and get discouraged and start dropping the "food" ball. Then the faces start telling the tale, and I remember real fast. I don't know what it is about my kids, but their food allergies show so quickly in their faces. With Isaiah it is mere seconds before he starts looking like David here. Bright red cheeks, little red dots all over the face and neck. (And, check out just how yellow and mucky David's nose is...with David, his nose starts going.)

How we got here is sort of a confluence of events that happened about five years ago. Isaiah's first year was very difficult. He had colic forever. We sort of playfully joke that he came out of the womb screaming and didn't stop for months on end. And then, one day, it stopped and there really was a cuddly little baby smiling and cooing. We were a bit taken aback. That day was his first on a very expensive formula called Nutrimagen, which has no cow's milk protein in it and (if I remember correctly) was made mostly with soy protein. A week or so later, they started my barely six months old kiddo on Prevacid. We kept on with this routine until he turned one or so. It was beyond expensive, but we were willing to do anything to keep Isaiah's tummy happy!

Mommy, however, was not happy. Prevacid? For a baby? For "heartburn"? Wha??? I was pretty young and inexperienced then, and took whatever my inept pediatrician said as the gospel truth. (While a nice guy, he really didn't deal with the problems- he just medicated. I've had other friends that saw the same Dr say the same thing.) But I could not settle in my mind that Isaiah was going to be on these crazy medications for the rest of his life; there had to be a cause. About the time Isaiah was a year and a half old, The Maker's Diet by Jordan Rubin came out. My husband and I were both getting frustrated with our weight, and the book attracted us. I remember finishing the first chapter, walking to my pantry, and just being shocked at what was actually there in the light of what I had been reading about preservatives and additives and how they affect the system. I couldn't find one thing in the pantry that wasn't processed and preserved within an inch of its life. We were so broke at the time (and I have a whole different post I'd like to write about eating healthfully on a dime and how poverty affects obesity), and the pantry consisted of Hamburger Helper, Ramen noodles, canned vegetables that had tons of MSG and sodium in them, sugary, colorful cereal that had more fake stuff in it than actual wheat and flour...I was working with what I knew. I only had forty dollars a week that I could buy groceries with, and I bought what I could get the most of- processed, prepared food. I knew no other way.

I was finishing the book up right around the time Isaiah turned two, and we switched pediatricians. His pediatrician (which we still see today) has over forty years in practice, and she diagnosed him on the first day with serious food allergies. She was upset that he had been put on Prevacid with out any tests being run to see what was causing the heartburn/GERD. She immediately took him off so that testing could be done to examine his allergies (which would not respond correctly if the medication was in his system).  Some things were obvious- like milk. Most food allergy testing is done by elimination diet, where everything is taken out and then the suspected offending foods are added back in and the body's reaction is observed. Isaiah kept having a problem when the diet was over with and we went back to 'normal'. About the second time through it occurred to me that when he finished the diet, he started having processed foods again. In my totally unscientific way, I took a bit of powder from a processed meal (can't remember what it was now) and rubbed it on his skin. Within five seconds, he had a huge welt where I had rubbed the stuff. I grabbed a bunch of different things out of the pantry, and did the same thing- the worst reactions were for things that had artificial dye in them, citric acid, and sulfites. I only thought to do this because of the Maker's Diet book and the information he gives on preservatives. (And, due to the extreme rise in food allergies, they now actually do skin tests just like this [similar to testing for environmental allergies like ragweed and pollen], as well as blood tests.) I compared notes with his pediatrician, and while she seemed skeptical, she recommended that I try keeping the processed foods out and see what happened.

James and I were so freaked by seeing what happened to Isaiah's arm that day that we didn't need a second thought about going completely organic and unprocessed. We didn't go organic to be green or be a good steward (although those are great side effects) but because organic by law has very few, if any chemical additives. We decided that everyone would start this new adventure together. The health benefits were unmistakable. James and my cholesterol numbers and blood pressure numbers dropped and normalized (we were both headed for prediabetes and hypertension). The kids' eczema disappeared. We went from tons of ear infections and colds to maybe one or two a season.

And wouldn't you know, everybody was literally happier? Isaiah had these horrible temper tantrums and rages that were pretty scary for a two year old. They were not 'normal' in the typical two year old sense. By the time he was three, he no longer raged. He had his moments, sure, but they were so different, so subdued. Dianne Craft has this great way of putting things (more on her later), and she says about a SPD kid and handwriting that, "well of course it got all messy! that's where the tag on the back of my shirt took over!" For Isaiah, behaviorally, (before we figured out the allergies) we could put it this way: "Of course I am having a raging temper tantrum! This where my food allergies took over and made me feel awful! Don't you understand what I am saying?" To this day, I can tell immediately when he has had food that's not okay for him because his SPD reactions and tempers go exponentially with how much he has had. (I'll explain what I mean by SPD reactions a little bit later).

When Josiah started in with the colic about four weeks ago, and the face started going, I had a pretty good idea of what we were dealing with. What I didn't know while breastfeeding Isaiah, I do know now- that mama can take all the dairy out of her diet (or any other offending food) and there is no need to go to formula. After having both bottle-fed and breast fed all of my kids, I would love to breastfeed the whole time with Josiah. I have a slew of reasons, but the most obvious? It's waaaaay cheaper to breastfeed! Could you imagine the cost of Nutrimagen for a month at $27.50 for a small can? Yikes!

Here's my "duh" moment. Dairy allergies are almost always hereditary. If a parent has it, it's almost guaranteed that the child will have it too. We've always puzzled over this fact, since neither James nor I appeared to have a dairy allergy. (Ha!) So when I start taking dairy out for Josiah, I notice this difference. One day turns into two, and the difference gets more obvious. I feel better. My tummy doesn't hurt so much. A host of things change. Weight pours off, which it had never done before (literally, this is the first time in my life that weight has come off in a 'normal' manner if I am doing the right things- exercising and calorie intake wise. Guess what one of the side effects of a dairy allergy in an adult is? Inability to lose weight.) And boy, can I tell when I accidentally eat something with cows milk in it - the feeling is unmistakable  in five minutes or so- like that "oh my goodness I've eaten the whole turkey Thanksgiving gassy feeling". Geez, no wonder my kids get so grumpy when they have milk. I get grumpy too!

Speaking of grumpy, a little man is waking up from his nap and wanting to eat, so I need to go. More tommorrow.

Ode to fall...

Fall, how I love thee. The cool air, the leaves turning, the fact that one can breathe again and not sweat buckets. These are very important things.

But.

Alas.

With your coming, it means that the Farmer's Market is on its very last days.

And we will very, very much miss that.

Can't we work out a compromise?

We'll eat our beets.

Sincerely,

The family addicted to local food and fresh made bread

It's becoming tradition...

I've received an email from a friend in which she states that I am causing her to tread near the sin of coveting, and well, I've decided to push her will power. I shouldn't really cause someone to fall. But tell me, can you resist this? Fresh, local, handpicked, red all the way through. Forgive me? (If it makes you feel any better, we've taken to laughingly calling them "crack" berries. They really are that good.)

And fiddle music, for Ben.
 

How does your garden grow?

To Market...

Every third or fourth Saturday, our family heads out on a short 20 minute drive to the whole and bulk foods market run by a local Mennonite order. We love this little trip as much for the scenery as for the food. We pass by our "dream" house- a hundred and fifty year old farmstead. We cross over the river, clear and cool...not too soon after that, we arrive at our destination. The secret is the wonderful family style restaurant right next door called (what else?)-  The Farmer's Daughter. Oh my word, the food is local, seasonal, and beyond fantastic. Our kids happen to be partial to the carrot souffle. It's a wonderful, frugal (particularly with four kids) throw back to slower times.

Our trip to market is a favorite tradition for this city-turned-country girl. We've probably been making this trip for almost a year now, and I have been struck by the seasonality of it. I never realized the actual growing times for things like strawberries or tomatoes, which appear on our grocery store shelves year round. (And are probably from as far away as New Zealand, Peru, or Columbia.) I realize this now, because each trip we take down to the market I see those things growing and being harvested in their seasons. And trust me, once you've had a fresh tomato from right off the vine, there just isn't any going back to those pasty, watery supermarket ones.

I love going to this market as much for the Mennonite ladies (and sometimes, men) and their peaceful way of life as I do for the quality and cost of their food. It's the only place in the area that I can get naturally sourced grains, beef, and other needs (for Isaiah and his no-synthetic-preservative diet) without paying an arm and a leg like I would have to if I went to our natural foods store.  We aren't weird here- us and our four kids walking the tiny aisles are as familiar to them as their own little girls running around barefoot in their jewel toned dresses and dangling Kapps and their boys with their suspenders and straw hats. Soft hymns play in the background, and the smell of freshly baked bread tickles the senses. Things are still counted out by hand. It's such a beautiful, poignant reminder to slow down.

Oh, boy.

Oh, Isaiah. Forever going a million miles a minute, glasses half off, skewed to the right or left from the last tumble he took; a blur of activity. I must touch, and sing and comment on everything I do- this is Isaiah's modus operandi. But yet, a darkness blurs his sunny disposition. A terror, a scream, when a dog is sighted, a suggestion to swing is made, loud colors or noises surround.  He screams in outright terror, physical fear shakes him. He begs to leave, to go the bathroom (his way of saying it is all too much for him), to hide.  What is this that troubles my dear one?

He is wholly unlike my other children in this regard- every child has their good days and bad days, likes and dislikes. But Isaiah? His reach bright florescence: if he likes something, he really likes it. If he doesn't like it, he really doesn't like it. 

The momma heart questions, watches, observes. Nearly a year and a half go by, with no real change in his reactions, and the usual issues are ruled out: food allergies, ear infections, colds, lack of sleep...the laundry list of childhood ailments that every momma works through when a child is struggling. The doctors watch too, and finally, referrals to specialists. All is not right here.

And so, a question answered. Sensory Processing Disorder. An answer, and yet a whole host of new questions beckon. Why Isaiah? Why SPD? How can I help him? Can we make this better?

The short, lay answer: Isaiah sees, hears, feels just as you or I do. But the way his body processes it is abnormal, meaning that certain sensory things can send cause his brain to go haywire. Therapy is required to help establish the pathways in his brain that were missing, and causing the 'train to go  off the tracks' so to speak. His is mostly vision related; his hearing and speech are normal, but his vision is not. The way one doctor explained it to me, his SPD is due to the fact that his eyes don't "talk" as fast to the brain as his ears and other sensory centers do, causing physical discomfort (dizziness and clumsiness are common in kids like Isaiah). His seeming "over reaction" to certain sensory things is actually his and his body's attempt to 'make sense' of what is going on. He quickly tires in high sensory environments because his body and brain have to work very hard to make sense of things. He regards swinging with abject fear ( and wouldn't you?) because it totally messes with all of his sensory centers. He has absolutely no idea where he is when he is swinging because his eyes, brain, and ears aren't talking to one another in a way he can understand.

In the end, this means that the normal four year old issues are exacerbated. A normal four year old has a lot of things going on emotionally, mentally, and physically and Isaiah is no different. But some things are off: picking up toys, for example. This used to be a huge battleground for Isaiah and I- I'd ask him to pick up the blue car and put it in the bucket, and he'd just gape at me. I'd get angry, thinking he was being defiant. But now that a lot of answers have come, I now understand that a lot of the time, Isaiah has a hard time actually seeing the toy. (His eyes do not "team" together, meaning that objects often 'jump' around on him- it's also why he tends to walk into door frames.) If he can't see the toy, how can he pick it up? I've been learning to connect, direct, and touch with him. First, I need to get on Isaiah 's eye level, and get his attention. "Pick up the blue car."  Second, I need to ask him what I said, and he repeats back to me. "You want me to pick up the blue car." Third, I take Isaiah's hand and rest it on the car. We do this four maybe five times with a few different toys, and then he can usually pick up the rest of his playthings on his own. Talk about a eureka moment.

I feel relieved, yet frightened. Relieved that we have an answer, but worried about what it all means, and the ever present momma questions: Am I doing enough? Will he be okay?

But you know what? All I can do is be with Isaiah in the right here and now. Tomorrow will take care of itself.

Finding new uses...

We finally got the deck finished (all that remains is a good scrub and stain) but ended up with a huge leftover pile of wood and, in particular, pickets. (Like the ones on the stairs in the right upper corner of the picture). We were quite stumped as what to do with them. Our garden had gotten quite over-grown due to a lack of a border; while mulched, one mow would cause the weeds to grow overnight. We recently took a drive up into the mountains along a road that has a bunch of old farm homesteads, and I noticed the fences, which were, essentially, old logs layered one on top of the other. I suddenly had an "aha" moment, and knew exactly how to re-use those pickets. We're really pleased with the results. I just couldn't bear the thought of them going to the dump, and it took James maybe an hour to fit together a 18 foot long span. (He just used decking screws through the ends of the pickets.) The best thing is that it's entirely movable, so if we feel like changing the landscape around, we just have to pick up the end and rearrange it.